Sevenfold Silence

There's an unspoken sentiment, I think, in the otherkin community that if I don't call you on your bullshit, you won't call me on mine.

I think, on the whole, we tend to be a thoughtful, sensitive bunch. We have to be, after all, to come to the conclusions we have. (They're not 'natural', and they require that we be in-tune with ourselves, at least to a degree.) That fact, combined with the fact that due to being 'different' we've dealt with our share of exclusion and alienation, leads to the fact that we're sensitive to alienation ourselves and don't want to alienate others.

On the good side, this leads to a lot of general politeness, and minimal flaming, at least that I've seen. (Think about all the newbies panicking about astral battles and the veil falling. Instead of being laughed out of the community, they're politely and gently shepherded to take a few breaths and ground.) I think that also this can lead us to put forward claims more boldly--we know we aren't going to be questioned on them or ridiculed.

Toward the grayer end of things, though, it lets a lot of claims go unquestioned and unsubstantiated. Think of all the elven princesses. Think of the reincarnations of anime characters (hell, they're a blog post in and of themselves). Think of the Neptunian fairy space wolves, as I think the Field Guide called them--the weird one-person menageries of creatures. We may be able to put forward our claims better, but we can't discuss them in great depth--that might harm someone's feelings.

Are all their claims bullshit? I'm willing to lay my money on "probably not"--there's at least a kernel of truth in a fair number of them. I doubt, though, that they're all true, or all sincere.

There are definitely a handful of people in the Otherkin community I'd like to grab and shake by the shoulders. But that general principle--live and let live, don't question my bullshit and I won't question yours--abides. It might break my heart to be told I'm not a fey-thing, so I won't tell you you're not a Neptunian fairy space wolf. Not to mention that it doesn't actually hurt me that you're saying you are. Maybe it embarrasses me, a little, but I'll live. Like Thomas Jefferson said, it neither picks my pocket nor blackens my eye.

Is it fair, just, good that I can't question others' claims? I don't know. I think sometimes it impedes intelligent conversation. And personally, I know that I appreciate a polite, civil degree of bullshit-calling--I'm happy to receive the feedback of others regarding what they think I may or may not be. I appreciate the extra perspective.

But ultimately, for the sake of social mores and sensitivity, I'm willing to not call people on their bullshit unless it's supremely irritating and inhibiting discussion. What others say doesn't really affect me in any noticeable way--though it may tweak me at times.

And I don't find discussion of ideas and comparison thereof to be intimidating or upsetting, either. I'm pleased that our openness lets us put forward ideas, but if we can't discuss those ideas we haven't gained anything.